Personal training is kicking my butt. I meet with my personal trainer once a week. It sucks. I try and psyche myself up each time, and each time I find myself barely surviving through the grueling 30 minutes of lifting, crunching, core and anything else she feels like putting me through that day. The go-to exercises I've been doing for years? I've been doing them wrong. Things I generally avoid because they hurt too much? Yeah, those are really "good" for you and I've been doing them every week now. As a pastor, I really pride myself on not hating anything or anyone. But I hate these workouts. I hate not knowing how much longer I have to do any particular exercise and just suffering through, feeling totally inadequate in my manhood and muscles. But what I really loathe are pushups (done correctly mind you) - pushups are evil. Hate, hate, hate pushups.
Yes, it's quite comical how much of a "sassy" client I am. I whine. I curse under my breath. I feel elated when she says, "One more" or "switch" and when she says, "Let's do five more" I instantly think to myself, "Let's not and say we did." In those moments, "no pain no gain" finally makes sense and yet I still hate it all the same. But it is exactly those moments that I now recognize WHY we all need to add some extra accountability in our lives to accomplish our goals - because if left to our own, we'd quit. We'd settle for "almost" and justify our "not quite our best" because no one else is around to say anything to the contrary. No, if all of my cursing about pushups and tricep kickbacks and squats and burpees and exercise ball crunches is going to be worth it, I need to step out of the leader chair and do what I'm told. As much as I hate doing more than one pushup, when you're committed, you're committed.
Sounds great, but up until yesterday, I wasn't really all that committed, to be honest. I realized that when I was called out for not working out at the gym more often - and didn't really feel all that guilty. I know that my 30 minutes of hell is supposed to get easier if I work on these same exercises throughout the rest of the week post-personal training day. But... I haven't. Nope. Instead, I've just kept doing my usual thing of going out for a 3-5 mile run a couple days a week. Respectable right? Heck, I even did a half marathon! Yet, jogging, according to my personal trainer, will "kill" me in the end. I don't say this to throw her under the bus by any means, but her education and expertise in the area of nutrition and fitness has led to the conclusion that after a certain point, running really isn't doing "enough" for for a person's over all metabolic health. She wants me to give up running (gasp!) Say what lady?! I was offended. My whole world started to spin. I kind of felt like Will Ferrell did when he took a tranquilizer to the jugular in Old School. Mind. Blown. Turns out the one thing I've been doing, and only doing, is actually keeping me from getting where I want to go. Again, if I want to maintain and stay where I am, then long-distance running seems to be a perfectly acceptable exercise of choice. But if I want to see new results, and tone up and be in the best physical shape of my life - the only running that passes the test is interval training - sprinting intermittently - in addition to weight-training and ab-work (another thing I loathe). And as much as I want to write her off, quit the gym and just do my thing, I know she's right.
So, I find myself at a real crossroads. I love running and the clarity it brings, the feeling of ticking off
All of this makes me wonder about how much we all do this sort of thing with the rest of our lives. I wonder how many of us say we want to change or be more like Jesus or lose weight or stop obsessing about technology, but what we really mean is: I want that kind of change to happen only if it means I can continue to take the path of least resistance. I wonder what would happen if we stopped letting ourselves off the hook and actually put ourselves in a position to achieve our best by giving our best? What would that look like for you? What's the one thing you could or should give up so that something else might better fit in your routine? What's something you've always wanted to try but haven't yet? What's stopping you? For me, it's saying "No" more often to unhealthy habits and whining, and sticking it out when things are really tough or when things are not going the way I'd like them to. It's saying yes to my goals, commitments and aspirations even though I would prefer to do the same ol' same ol' because I am more comfortable. I know I am capable - completing a half marathon has given me that confidence, but now it's just a matter of will - do I really desire the kind of change that only comes with taking the road less traveled?
